Blades of Time Review

Remember Stephanie Ryan? She was that hot girl from your high school graduating class that every guy wanted. Stephanie had the perfect figure, a beautiful face, got straight A’s, competed in varsity everything and even volunteered on the weekends. But, let me tell you something about Stephanie Ryan; she was broken goods. Sure, she looked perfect on the outside, but inside she was a mess, I promise. Blades of Time suffers from Stephanie Ryan Syndrome (SRS) in the worst possible ways.

Blades of Time is the spiritual successor to X-Blades, a hack-and-slash originally released for the PC by Gaijin Entertainment. Blades of Time has received a major overhaul from its 2007 predecessor but this game is far from perfect. Gamers play as Ayumi, a sexy treasure hunter who dual-wields badass blades and has the ability to reverse time. Players must use this “Time Rewind” to strategically take out foes and solve puzzles. Ayumi travels through a variety of mediocre locales as she tries to find a meaning to her journey by unlocking the mysteries of the island she now inhabits.


On the surface, Blades of Time is a great title that plays well and has some kick-ass graphics. But, delving deeper into the depths with Ayumi reveals a boring, dated game that steals from every other successful title released in the last ten years. Just as Stephanie Ryan stole her personality from the Olsen Twins, Teen Cosmo, and the hot chick from Saved by the Bell, Ayumi seems to be a mash-up of Kratos from God of War and Lara Croft from Tomb Raider. Her moves are ripped right out from under Dante in Devil May Cry and the world she explores feels like Earth in Darksiders. The foes Ayumi must face are a mix of Final Fantasy XIII and Shadow of Colossus while the “Time Rewind” is an honestly clever twist on Prince of Persia: Sands of Time. All this probably sounded great in the developer’s pitch meeting, but Blades of Time falls flat on its face in almost every aspect.

The graphics, which initially look stunning, quickly lose their luster with glitchy cutscenes, awkward camera angles, and the realization that the entire game is over-exposed. The audio sync is about one second behind, which becomes quite bothersome during long conversation sequences that never let story bubble to the surface. Most of the story the player does uncover is told through poorly written, exposition-heavy monologues needlessly spouted off while walking from one enemy hub to the next.

blades of time

Blades of Time’s storyline is about as paper thin as the scrapbook Stephanie Ryan’s been keeping since kindergarten. And just like those tattered little pages, Ayumi’s quest is linear, completely nonsensical, and utterly confusing. How does everyone know who Ayumi’s partner is? Why must you unlock this island’s magical secrets? What fabric could possibly keep Ayumi’s boobs that well supported? These are all questions that I’m sure were answered at one point or another, but there’s no way to tell. Most NPC monologues sound like common, ancient mumbo jumbo, but even Ayumi’s on-the-nose exposition does nothing to decipher the mess. Ayumi seems to be asking the same questions as the gamer!

Blades of Time is a game that spirals from moderately amusing to downright frustrating within a half-hour of gameplay. The “Time Rewind” feature adds some “Oh, sh*t!” moments, but seems like an incomplete system that’s two steps away from being something truly special. If the passable storyline can be ignored (which is not difficult to do) gamers will still be confounded by the overly difficult enemies and the uselessness of the game’s compass system. The one thing that Blades has in its favor is the vivacious protagonist who is better seen than heard. Much like your high school fantasies of Stephanie Ryan, Blades of Time is a game that would be perfect for ten minutes of alone time, but tough to settle down and grow old with.


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Author: Mike Deas View all posts by
Mike is a gamer, writer and pretzel muncher. He plays on Easy, rarely completes side quests, and hates himself for relying on walkthroughs.

One Comment on "Blades of Time Review"

  1. Angel May 13, 2012 at 10:54 am -

    VOTE 10!!!!!!!!!!

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